If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
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We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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