My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
You're so nebulous sometimes
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
