There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I have tasted many bathrooms
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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