i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize