just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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