last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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