Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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