So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
false alarm. still invincible.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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