Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
