Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
so let's talk penis.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
