at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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