Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
well you can't waste a boner
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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