whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize