I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
