There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
