The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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