Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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