Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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