omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?