your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
