It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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