I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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