Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
