I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
