he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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