I met the friendliest cop last night
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
foreskin is a definite game changer
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
