Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
