Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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