Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
