I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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