What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
