Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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