he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
organizing the empties. That sober.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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