and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
