No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
