member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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