this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
These tits shall not be calmed
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
