why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
