Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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