hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
