like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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