so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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