I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize