That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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