im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
