**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
