David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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