I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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