Me too!
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
