I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Just invented taco cereal.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
